12 steps to boost your self-confidence
A lot of factors go into success and happiness. Some will say luck, hard work, relationships, talents, and more. However, I submit that the single biggest component is CONFIDENCE!
As an introvert, I used to think confidence was elusive and reserved for the extroverted. However, as we learn about our own introversion and embrace our true selves, we have every bit as much claim to a healthy dose of self-confidence.
For most of us, low self-esteem started early in life and often was closely attached to our own misunderstanding of introversion as a curse, along with the lack of family and school support for our own personal journey.
As adults, we finally began to explore our introversion. We realized no one "overcomes" or "gets rid of" introversion and that it can actually be a blessing. Our journey has begun to discover that we can be proud, strong, and confident. We can have our dreams.
This evolution can take a lot of effort and patience.
12 Steps to Bolster Your Self-Confidence
...and accelerate to your own place of happiness, comfort, and success.
Find your passion. Remember when you were a kid and your parents shuffled you off to gymnastics, scouts, t-ball, basketball, dance, music, on and on? They were trying to help you find something you really loved because they knew that when we truly have a passion for something, we do it most energetically, we become good at it, proud, confident! As adults, we should keep enjoying our passions and also search for more hobbies we love.
Stretch kindly. When you find new adventures, this can be exciting and scary, whether it's presentations at work, new hobbies at home, or new adventures outdoors. Rather than set ourselves up for failure by jumping immediately into the deep end, break it down into small steps. Incremental stretching may lead to significant accomplishments. And remember it's the journey, not the destination. It doesn't matter how far you go. Take pride in the fact you are trying something new and scary. Be self-compassionate as you stretch.
Learn about YOU. Rather than admire others, learn about your own strengths. Many introverts are kind, curious, creative, team players, resilient, and great planners. These are traits that make great friends, partners, and business leaders. Be proud of your strengths. Practice them and share them with the world! Join over 2,200 people who have taken our free and insightful Introvert's Superpower Quiz to learn more.
Manage your energy. Introverts tend to gain energy by using our strengths and enjoying our hobbies. Our energy drains in uncomfortable social situations, debates, or if we are put on the spot. As our energy drains, our confidence drains as well. So be aware of what drains and energizes you. Monitor your energy level during the day and take breaks to avoid an energy crash.
Focus on the now. Introverts can dwell on the past, ruminate over our shortcomings, or fear stressful situations that loom in the future. Limit those energy-drainers and keep your mind in the present. This will help you focus on using your strengths, managing your energy, and accomplishing your tasks.
Maintain a task list. Even a simple list will help declutter your mind by getting ideas or deadlines out of your head and onto paper. Thus you can focus more on the now. You can also review your task list throughout the day and at the end regale in your accomplishments rather than fixate on the tasks of tomorrow.
Compete with yourself. Too often we set goals in comparison with others. We want to be faster, richer, a higher level at work than others. But these are often largely out of our control and degrading. Set goals that you control, that reflect the aspired quality or quantity of your work. That way you can push yourself to improve and celebrate your successes, regardless of how others do. This encourages us to cheer on our co-workers while we focus our attention on our work. That's something to be proud of!
Climb off the ledge. We can oftentimes get wrapped up in the emotion of the moment. It can bring us down and suddenly we are doubting everything, most especially ourselves. If we just pause, peel back the emotion, and evaluate the situation as it is, we will find the situation is not so bad. People are not making fun of you, your world is not ending. It's time to stop the negativity, pick up the pieces, and move on.
Bring a BOLD attitude. Many introverts have felt a bit second-class, subservient at times to our extroverted cohorts. This has been supported by our culture, our schools and workplaces, and even our families and places of worship. It's time to push back on those stereotypes and boldly flaunt our introversion. Tell people you are an introvert and before they share a sympathetic eye, pronounce how you embrace your introversion, love your hobbies, exert your strengths! You aren't looking for pity. It's not we who need to change but others need to realize the introvert stigma is old, worn out, and in the past.
Journal your successes. Journaling is a great way to park your worries but an even better way to celebrate your accomplishments. Don't let your triumphs be fleeting. Write them down. Re-read them. Tell others. Journaling your success is a great confidence booster.
Give yourself some PST. Too often we are our own worst critics. We belittle our accomplishments, we rip into our brave attempts, we compare ourselves with others with harsh words. Our words are quite powerful. Replace the severe condemnation with PST - Positive Self Talk. Be your biggest cheerleader. Encourage yourself before meetings and social calls. Celebrate your efforts and accomplishments.
Be the bouncer! Protect your turf and yourself. Surround yourself with positive supporters who will help you on your journey. Be your own bouncer. Get rid of the naysayers, the critics, the doubters.
When we fill our lives with our own passions, champion our successes, and surround ourselves with positive support, our confidence blooms. With higher self-esteem, we are poised to pursue our dreams with vigor. Time teaches us that life is indeed short. We don't need to wallow in self-pity, but instead, build our confidence, embrace our introversion, and become our best selves! Let's go kick a$$!
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The Introvert's Thrival Plan
Life is not about just “surviving” the challenges ahead, but “thriving” in the process. To do this, we need a Thrival Plan so we can lean on our innate talents to succeed with confidence and tranquility.
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